What Is There to be Afraid Of... Really?

It is FRIDAY ... Can I simply say --- What a last 24 hours, What a week, What a past 6 weeks, what a season ---

My week started out like most --- Sleepy children on a Monday, laundry, catch - up with the many stacks that have found themselves in my path, info gathered on Harry S Truman & Mercury for school projects --- All things that might seem mundane, but considering my last few months, all tasks that I both crave & treasure...

Tuesday --- Coffee & Conversation with a dear friend and another "first."  After losing someone you love I have realized that much of your days center around "firsts" ... The first family dinner, The first time you pick up the phone & remember he is not there to answer, The first time you go home (have not faced that one --- but plan to next weekend) & this week the first time I walked into a hospital.  I have not been to a hospital since the day we met with the surgeons to hear the possible & impossible treatments options.  I walked out of the hospital that day with my Dad by my side not knowing --- Is he or Isn't he ... We all now know that he didn't return --- He made the bravest, wisest & kindest decision... He took his time with us & not a team of surgeons ... Ben Brown died as he lived, on his own terms.  But that is not what Tuesday, March 29th was to be about ... A father of a friend, who is now himself a friend, is fighting his own battle --- Happily he is well on his way to victory.  In the deepest place of my heart I wanted & needed to wish him well in person.  I find myself in the parking deck wondering, "Can I really go in there and bring comfort & joy?"

That is where my Heavenly Father and my earthly one, who now has a better eye on me, taught me a lesson.  You see, I walked in that hospital room, had a delightful visit and left with my heart full of JOY.  I did not do one thing for the ones I visited --- They put a piece of me back in my heart.  I get it --- We do good, not for the benefit of others - They are already in the hands of the Healer ... We do good because it simply makes us better.  Thank you, Sweet Ones --- This week I wish you the same HEALING you gave me!

You see I was AFRAID ... I do not like admitting that.  I do however like that I faced it & I conquered it ... The rest of the week --- One part of my heart went flying over the handlebars - He is now the proud owner of some pretty impreesive scars... 2 of the 3 of my 4-legged parts of my heart survived an attack of what we now believe to be a hawk, They are too the proud new owners of quite a survival story... Fear --- It is there ... Have wished more than once that I could lock those I love up, throw away the key & simply be ...

Again I get a message ... The sun is back out, there was laughter from a bruised faced, dog treats happily taken & believe it or not the world kept right on spinning ... So no doors have been locked, instead they have been opened & with a shrug of the shoulders & and a chuckle I know REALLY there is nothing to be afraid of...

Happy Day - NO fear, JOY will CONQUER & HEAL ... You simply have to OPEN the door!

Love, me